I was fragile …

My love is not easily giving away
So please don’t take advantage
Of my heart
I hear your words but your
Actions remain the same
Never thinking about me
And always walking away
How can you expect me not change
All the things you did
The jealousy the rage
That I remember from when I was younger
I did my best
But you kept putting
My heart to the test
By disregarding the pain in
My chest
How I hated drugs
And how I hated to fight
But things just got worse
Every time I tried
You never thought about me
And how I felt about things
I couldn’t even wear my old jewelry
And God forbid my friends wanted to get a bite to eat
That was the end of the world
Like I was going out to cheat
Mean while I was coming home to you
And you knew that was the truth
I got so tired of the shit …
And all the things you put me through
I cleaned , cooked , worked
I even smoked just to
Please you
And when I didn’t do that
I encouraged us both to grow
But you just didn’t want
to let go
Of your hurt and pain
And all the things
You felt as a kid
I even tried to reconcile your relationships that were ruined
since you were a kid .
I felt your pain
I just wished you
Felt mine
Only if you realize I did my best while you didn’t try
I fought for my son you
Thought that shit was a joke
And when special days came
you could careless about those days
I had to figure it out
And I did my best to save the day
I felt like I was never enough
No matter what I did
Not one day did I feel appreciated
So now your mad cause my heart
Faded away but what did you add to the table but heartache and pain . Original By Rachel Shundari Ullah ©

Published by

Rachel Shundari ullah

I am a strong woman / mother that has been on my own since 15 years old without the proper guidance or structure. I am currently a volunteer for true2life . I have a purpose deeper than just me , I am the founder and president of my non profit organization named Its Beneath The Surface ( I am U ) . Our mission is to create a universal support system for our youth , teenagers , parents ,and adults of all ages that deal with everyday adversities .