Dear Son

1 + 1 never equals 3 If shit don’t add up expect me to speak …You created the monster in me and expect me to not feel all the things you’ve shown me . You constantly lied , cheated and manipulated me by telling me what I wanted to hear , how do you expect me expect me to leave you alone and forget all you’ve done while you had your fun playing with my mind while taking you your time to handle your business and think I wasn’t going to call you out when I caught you slipping , all the promises you made , and you wonder why I be flipping . how do I go about my day peacefully when you took all you had to give . My spirit my smile all for fun not thinking about me and all I’ve done . I’ve sat back and wondered where I went wrong then I realized it had to do with me And men I choose for you to see . The ones that never took the time to show you right from wrong . The ones that words were never true The ones that taught you their pain … Like not acknowledging you or taking the time to teach you how to be a man , probably thought nothing’s different so I’ll continue slipping …as I continue to fight , the more angry you got I guess you thought how do you want me to be all that he’s not . And expect me to be a man I never seen . I was as lost So I choose all I knew and that was being abused …mentally taunted and spiritually tainted I wish life was as beautiful as the one I painted for the world to see but you knew the real me , fighting to survive, crying to be understood, hurting so bad , hiding the truth . But through all that I held on to you , I didn’t Give up I fought for what I believe and prayed to God that he lead me not into temptation and continue to deliver me from evil while I did best to build you up and broke you down knowing another man has let you down . This is not what I planned but I exactly what I needed to understand your ways and the things I never let you say . Original By Rachel Shundari Ullah ©

Published by

Rachel Shundari ullah

I am a strong woman / mother that has been on my own since 14 years old without the proper guidance or structure. I am currently a volunteer for true2life . I have a purpose deeper then just me , I am the founder and president of my non profit organization named Its Beneath The Surface ( I am U ) . Our mission is to create a universal support system for our youth , teenagers , parents ,and adults of all ages that deal with everyday adversities .