I Never Needed You

How do you expect me to trust correctly
when betrayal is all I know
Abandoned since young
left to do things on my own
Having a child young
I needed help
Angry about my past
And hated what I’ve seen
Promised my myself
I would always be a woman that was clean
Scared of my truth and confused about love
How come no one can ever love me like the man up above
I put my best foot forward
and showed everyone my heart
Until they pushed me in a corner a tore my heart apart
I’m tired of loving so hard
I was always so true
you push me to the limit
and now I have no choice
but to forget about you too
You want to take my peace
and add to my pain
I don’t understand
your selfish
and jealous ways
So I hide my face
so you can’t see the hurt
I refuse to cry
You need help
I look in mirror
and I see what the monster
the world created
A woman that no longer
cares and refuses to cater
I was physically and emotionally a slave to your ways
Until you too raped me of my empathetic ways
Validation from another
takes the pain away
Temporarily ,I understand
this won’t last too long
But the way you have me feeling
is all the way wrong
I even cried to God
that we see better days
Now my eyes see clear
and I don’t like what I see
I see a person
that really doesn’t care
or appreciate me
A person that is threaten
by the things
that make me happy
A person that’s wants
No one else
witnessing this
Amazing side of me
You want me all to yourself
I can’t breathe ,
you’re suffocating me ,
while emotionally
making ass out of me
Aggressive with the way you speak
Nothing is never enough
Picking everything apart
Like I don’t know
how to survive myself
I told you I wasn’t with you
Because I needed help
and now you see
how I move
surviving
was never a issue
I never needed you .. I wanted you

Original by Rachel Shundari Ullah

Published by

Rachel Shundari ullah

I am a strong woman / mother that has been on my own since 14 years old without the proper guidance or structure. I am currently a volunteer for true2life . I have a purpose deeper then just me , I am the founder and president of my non profit organization named Its Beneath The Surface ( I am U ) . Our mission is to create a universal support system for our youth , teenagers , parents ,and adults of all ages that deal with everyday adversities .