Do unto others …

God planned this from my moms womb
All the scars ,
he left me with
so much to do
Being hurt lied too
And manipulated too
feeling like a fool
I didn’t even know God was giving me all the necessary tools
So I can excel in life
Know how to fight
Sometimes not being able to sleep at night
Was God telling me his
Like ..wake up
or I’m going to take
your life from you
Stop trying to show world
You have it all together
I’m going to humble and force
you to get your life together
Can’t you see the picture
I trusted you from birth
All that hurt
I’m going to turn it into victory
And make it look like light work
I know the truth
I know your heart
I know the fight
you put up from the very start
I know you cried
I wiped your tears
When you wanted give up
I know life messed you up
I sorry that choose you
Battered ,
But I seen potential in you
You have a purpose
and I’m going to use you
to do good
That body I’m building is not of the world
it’s of a spirit that understands
my truth
Do unto others as you have the then do unto you . Original by Rachel Shundari Ullah

Keep fighting !!!

alcohol , pills ,
heroine , cocaine
And sometimes Weed …
Is this the only way
to get along
Or hide your pain
Or your Shame
While you listen to everyone’s change
Listen to the truth
we are all individuals
It will be easy for some
And harder for others
It doesn’t mean you get discouraged
Step by step,
little by little
Don’t beat yourself up
No more abuse
You can fight it
if you try
And realize
Everyone experienced a different
Don’t give up
You matter too much
People need you
The world needs a person
Who tells the truth
And doesn’t submit to the thoughts of death
So you can tell the world or you neighbor next door
How you changed
You never know you may
Save the day
Or someone’s life
By telling them to continue to fight
And you survived
The hurt the pain
the sorrow
The rain
The confusion
The hate
The envy
The Shame
The days that you just want to
Just Run away
And the nights you just want
To fade away
And when all is said and done
You never stop praying and you always believe in Heavens face .
That’s the truth that needs to be heard
Who cares if the world doesn’t
Get who are
And the 12 steps didn’t get you far !!!
So what if your family or friends don’t forgive you as long as you forgive yourself .
I respect anyone that’s fighting
For help … Original by Rachel Shundari Ullah

What did you expect ?!?

Try to Understand my pain
How deep my wounds
Living with thoughts,
no clue
How did you expect me move
I told you the things I would do
If your words weren’t true
Now you’re mad cause I’m doing exactly whAt I said
Like reaching
for my goals ,
making bread ,
holding my head
not spreading my legs
A diamond in the ruff
but you were too clueless
no good of me
Thought you knew the real me
Did you really think
I was dizzy broad with no goals dreams
all you see in me
Is what’s in your dirty dreams
But as time past me by
I see your thoughts
your lies
so it brought me to a place
Where the games
you play
hold no weight
as you continue
To count your steps
trying get in my head
Not realizing
that part my head
is dead
my heart is cold
as you continue to unfold
your truth I can’t respect ,
the pain you say
you have In Your chest
makes no sense ,
I’m the one that kept
you focused and off the street reaching for things
you couldn’t see .
But I’m wrong
because you dropped the ball and your mind couldn’t stay strong
I promised you
I would always be around
but how can I stay when
Youre not owning your crown .
Original by Rachel Shundari Ullah

Cleansed eyes

Cleansed eyes …..
I can’t compromise my spirit
to benefit your soul
I cleansed myself
of all tainted energies
I seen the signs
You think your
love is blind
But I can see
through your eyes
your jaded ways
can longer
cloud my ways
Or take away
from my heart
I told you
who I was
from the start
Lie , never did I
Cried a river until it ran dry
Love is blind they say
but not in my eyes
How many times
does one have to cry
Cry to be heard
and understood
You know you were
up to no good
But your heart
wouldn’t tell the truth
You must have thought
I was the Devils food
Nd not a child of God
And he would let me
die in vain
And he wouldn’t
release the pain
Or let me see your face
the true you
Not the mask you wear
or who you pretend to be
I seen it in your eyes
Envy ,
hate ,
jealousy ,
hiding your Shame
playing mind games
Like I’m the one
that needed to change …
Love is blind in your eyes
but in my eyes love never existed … Original by Rachel Shundari Ullah

Family loves unconditionally !!!

The sun is shinning
I don’t hear the noise from
People dying
Rage turns to song
It’s been so long since
I was able to sing
this happy
Time passes , tears fade
I’m no longer worried about
What’s in our way
Faith stronger
Life is brighter
I can feel it today
It’s not only my pain
that is gradually
fading away
Conversations lighter ,
not forced
Stronger words ,
no more doubts
Or questioning
ones faults
No one is perfect
This we know …
Us against world
beating the odds
Learning more about
Each other
Learning not
to shout
Saying sorry
when wrong
Never boasting
When right
Loving on another
Helping each other out
Family is what we are
Family is what we always been
So think about joy
And think about love
and don’t forget to thank
that man from above ….
For continuing
to show us the way .
And showing us
Today is a new day !!!! Original By
Rachel Shundari Ullah

A personal relationship with God is all you need

They say there’s no condemnation in God .
So how does this work ?
Should I hold in my feelings
And not release my hurt
Or should I continue to hide
My pain by tainting my soul
Because the words you are
Saying won’t let me let go
This makes no sense
I hear the scripture you say
But by example I hear a whole bunch of fear hiding your truth
Scared to talk to lost souls.
Why won’t your words set people
Why is it so difficult to say once
Upon time this was me
Or I still struggle today
We’re no different
We’re the same
You paint a picture of a perfect
One without hurt or disgrace
So when I sin it’s hurts so
Much more within
So I hide my face and try
To ease my pain while I’m fading
I’m sorry I can’t live up to your expectation of your perfect slave
Filled with guilt as we pray
Your orders are filled every single day
You fill your home with food I could eat
While you wear the best and
I sit around waiting for pain
In my chest to end
This doesn’t make any sense
So I close my eyes and open my heart and praise harder than before .
Your words I longer hear cause the Devils lurking at my door
I guess it time to believe in the truth and open the bible for so many are living proof
Just remember you scared me away
But that doesn’t mean I don’t pray or want change
So now it’s my time to tell my truth I don’t need your space to witness Gods grace Original By Rachel Shundari Ullah ©

A prayer for my little lady …

If I could give you the world in a gift card
and watch you love yourself
the way you deserve
you would make my life complete
If I could watch you see yourself
through my eyes
I would never loose any sleep
If I could witness
your laughter
and tears of joy running
down your face
My days would be faced with ease
I can’t wait until you walk with your head held high and screwed what the world thinks
and finally realize
not many can compete
If I could take your pain away
You will realize
there’s no such thing as defeat
If you took the time to look
deeper then the surface
That’s where you will see
Who God intended for you to be
A woman that has beauty
that is not only skin deep
A woman that has fought
For what she believes
A woman that understands
who she is
A woman that still gives
no matter
if the world
continues to take
A woman that has faith in God
and watches her troubles
be washed away
A woman that is born again
To see a new way of life
A woman who finally believes that everything will be alright…original By Rachel Shundari Ullah ©

Soul searching are you ?

I’ll look through your eyes straight into your soul
and call you out on your shit
In my own way
So if please if you think you can destroy me
Think again

I’m stronger than you thought
Clearly now you see
devil doesn’t have
anything on me
I’ll beat the odds cause
God truly knows my heart
That’s the reason I’ll never stop
I made mistakes that’s definitely true
You thought your energy would get the better of me
Shame on you
I told you there’s only1ofme
A mother at heart a warrior by design
This journey I’m on is definitely super naturally designed
Designed for the world to see The real me
After I conquered all the demons in me
Finished with Shame , depression , anger , pride and pain thoughts of death
And losing Myself to anyone ..
There are levels to this
And I can no longer just accept the pain in Anyones chest
You can put me to the test
Not the smartest idea
I rather you trust my words
Or you will be faced with a very sad reality
Easy to see but hard to reach
Having full control over me
My body and my mind is mine
Not yours for just a good time
My past is gone
It no longer belongs to me
so if you really want to get to know me
you better look deeper then my body

So listen to my words and the things I say
this isn’t a game
and if your the devil ill see straight through your window pain … Original By Rachel Shundari Ullah ©

I thank GOD

I wake up alone
Thinking about what’s next
Then I think about
The pain I use to feel in my chest
So I thank god that he protected
Me from the start
Even though life happened
And I had to past many test
Repeated cycles
No where to turn
When will I learn my lesson
Life doesn’t seem fun
There’s so much more I deserve
I think to myself
Then God says “look at what you have
Your health your , kids , a job your life
I can’t bless you
if you can’t
Even see the blessing that are before you
Those times you think I ignore
Dig deep and smile despite
The hurt and the emotional abuse You’re use to
You’re no longer living in the past
When will you let the pain pass
Remember nights are longer and days shorter but I never walked away
But let me ask you a question have you took the time to pray
And thank god for all he is
And all your not
With odds stack against you so very high
You deserve soar you deserve fly
But I can’t bless you if you don’t try …” Original By Rachel Shundari Ullah ©

Trust in he !!!

I hear about , suicide , I hear about rape I hear about death all over the place … I’m tired of watching the world dying inside
It’s time for me to share my life
Shame no more I feel inside
Hate I no more try to hide
Only because Gods in my life
And made everything right
When will the world understand the truth
Believe in god I’m living proof
My heart use to hurt
And my soul use to cry
Because once upon time I too was
Dying inside
So I masked my pain
With a drink here a drink there and sometimes I drank
Until my thoughts and hurt I shared
Sometimes I punched
Sometimes I cried
Sometimes I didn’t care about life
But guess what I’m still here
If that’s not a testimony in its self
Anyone that knows me could tell you their self
Or maybe a little more truth from me
So you can have a little more faith in he …
Salvation is what set me free .
Trust in GOD and you will see !!!!
Original By Rachel Shundari Ullah ©